Confidence Boosters

Take a look below for some of my favourite confidence boosters. Also keep an eye on this change as I like to add new boosters every once in a while.

Affirmations:

Saying, thinking or writing positive thoughts makes us stronger. So go ahead now and write down what sort of person you would like to be. Make it snappy and to the point, write it in present tense and positive and make it something you are really longing for. (I am a great mother and a successful business woman at the same time. Or ‘I can handle it’)

Now write down your top three on post it’s and stick them anywhere you like. On your fridge, mirror, bedside table lamp, inside your car, your computer screen at work or your wallet. Try and say them out loud at least 3 times a day, with real conviction as if you already are that confident woman.

Feel the fear and do it anyway

We tend to think that we need to get rid of the fear in order to do it, but the reality is only once we have done it the fear will go away.

Start small, for example if you are terrified talking to strangers go to a place where you know most people but there are still a few strangers, like a friend’s party.

Now make a real effort to strike up conversations with just 1 person haven’t met before. A general 'Hi, I’m XX so how do you know the host/hostess.’ Is an easy conversation opener. But prepare 5 or six before the event. In this case striking up a conversation with someone you don’t know is your ‘goal’, if you do that it’s a success. Remember you don’t need to make a lifelong friend or find the man of your dreams you just need to say ‘Hi’ to someone you haven’t met yet.

Build on the experience and keep pushing yourself, next time chat up a couple of people and so on. But remember take it one step at a time and celebrate your success along the way.

Visualize

Close your eyes breathe deeply and focus on how that confident you looks like. Where are you, what are you wearing, what does your facial expression say, are they other people with you? What do they look like, what are they saying, and what are you saying? Are you doing something? How are you feeling?

Spend at least ten minutes calmly focusing on that image; make it more vivid each time you do this exercise. And do it at least once a day.

The key here is that our brain can’t distinguish between imagined images, sounds & feelings and real ones. Therefore if you spend a certain amount of time each day focusing on a confident you , your brain will start to think this is real and will send you the signals of this persons behaviours on a day to day basis.

Modelling

Do you know someone in real life or a public figure whose confidence you admire? Model them. Find out everything you can about them. What they do now and did. How did they get there, which hurdles did they overcome? What are their motivations? What keeps them going? What are their beliefs about life?

Find out as much as you can and then model their behaviour& patterns that you admire so much.  However be careful and subtle, you don’t want to end up copying them, just model them.

Talking positively

Here is something that can really change your perception and I just love to work on this during my coaching sessions.

Do an internal/external dialogue audit: Basically listen to what you say to yourself in your mind and out load.

Keep track of all the negative things you say about yourself and your life.

Now, think about them are they true?

What message are you sending to the people around you?

Would you like to change your internal and external dialogue?

Coaching can help you here. But you have already taken the first step and become aware. Now it is just about a matter of changing that dialogue.

Coaching can be an incredibly forceful tool on this subject.

Relax yourself into creativity

By doing repeated physical exercise or by slowing down your breathing or engaging in activities like yoga, Tai Chi and Meditation your are switching off that logical left side of the brain(beta level) and engaging your creative  side of your right brain( alpha level).

Go ahead try it now and just feel those ideas coming to you.